Stop Thinking the Worst

'They haven't phoned back they must have gone off me!'
'My boss didn't seem so friendly this morning I'm going to be fired!'
'My (fill in the blank) is 5 minutes late maybe they've been run over by a car or perhaps they are having an affair!

If any of this sounds familiar it's because you are used to automatically think the worst in situations and expect bad things to happen.

Expecting the worst can be a good thing…when it's a tool we use rather than a tyrant that uses and abuses us.

It's one thing to sometimes have a 'contingently plan' in your head like what to do if things go wrong. This can be a useful way of future planning when it's appropriate.

But if you find that you often or always expect the worst in the future then this session is for you.

Always assuming the worst is going to happen is also known as catastrophising. It is a form of negative and also 'black or white/all or nothing' thinking.

When you always expert the worst especially about things that are important to you like relationships or work then you are using a type of depressive thinking style.

It's all or nothing (black or white) and extreme because catastophisaiotn comes from your 'emotional brain' which works in an 'on/off' black or white 'fight or flight' way. All the shades of grey realistic thinking which gets pushes clumsily aside by the emotional brain.

Expecting the worst actually has more to do with feeling than thinking. The negative emotion, usually fear and despondency shape your thoughts.

Emotion causes extreme thinking

Because emotions deal in absolutes (scared people describe themselves as being completely terrified and depressed people may describe themselves as total failures) fear can make us expect the 'absolute worst' rather than say 'some things going well and some things going not so well.' This type of thinking is too moderate for the emotional brain although more in tune with reality.

Your expectations rely on how you use your imagination.

Expectations always occur through the imagination. When you imagine something you are using a kind of self-hypnosis. So people who expert the worst are basically hypnotically programming themselves to feel anxious, downcast and have bad experiences.

Expecting the worst, catastophising is otherwise known as misusing your imagination.

The imagination is a powerful tool nature has given us to help us create better futures. Like any tool it can be misused and some people spend their whole lives misusing it creating depressing negative expectations.

When you become generally calmer in life your perception becomes more reasonable and words like complete, total, absolutely are used less. You'll also feel like using your imagination more positively around future events.

Or you'll find you can even decide not to use your imagination at all. So sometimes you don't even need to expect the best you can just relax and leave a 'meaning vacuum' rather than desperately trying to 'fill in a meaning' for why something has or hasn't happened before you really know. For example if someone doesn't return your call you don't actually know why that is-if you are calm you can just relax with not knowing until such time as you do find out. You don't have to expect the worst or the best-this is a much more comfortable way of living.

Think about it. Catastrophists don't worry that their plane may be a little delayed or that some parts of the flight may be less enjoyable than others etc no they have to make it dramatic because emotions (because they are really there for survival purposes) have to be dramatic. So it becomes not 'if the plane is slightly delayed' but 'when I miss the plane and everyone ends up hating me because I let them all down!' or if they are really 'good' at expecting the worst: 'When my plane crashes!'

Expecting the worst and superstition.

Then again sometimes there is a superstitious element to expecting the worst in situations. The feeling is that expecting things to go well is pushing their luck or 'tempting fate' and that by expecting the worst all the time and catastrophising and anticipating disasters they will never actually be disappointed by the future.

Whew what a way to live!

The problem is that it's depressing and also creates more negative emotion and pessimism.

For the vast majority of time disasters don't happen. Billions of people fly each year and don't crash, but the response to this may be 'Yes but knowing my luck….!' But think about it? How many disasters have you experienced? Are you still alive? Even if you've had dozens of disasters you are still here so, in fact, you have enormous luck!

Expecting realistic outcomes or (dare I say) the best outcomes, doesn't just make you feel better it gives you other benefits too.

Expecting the best makes you an optimist and so instantly more attractive to other people. Being optimistic helps your immune system boosts your happiness levels and actually means you will be more likely to succeed in all areas because you will have more determination and therefore try for longer because deep down you'll believe things can go well.

Expecting the worst turns us into quitters.

Using your brain productively to create positive 'blueprints' for your future experience will pay huge dividends in life because your brain tends to work towards clear 'instructions' so they may as well be positive.

And even with things you can't control (such as whether your flight will be on time) you can at least expect the best of yourself that whatever happens you'll manage the situation. When you respond well to a bad situation then, in a way it becomes a good situation.

This session will help you to use your imagination constructively around future events letting you feel so much better and also perform more effectively in life.

Download Stop Expecting the Worst now and give life a chance.